Chris Matthews: Giant Cranium Endangers Self, Others

Case originated @ The Political Teen

It's a sad diagnosis. Giant Craniom Syndrome or, GCS, is more common that you think.

Luckily, those afflicted are often able to find work in broadcasting or politics and draw obscene salaries.

Well known cases include Senator Ted Kennedy, Jordan Eason and a newcomer, Representative John Murtha.

GCS has been shown to cause symptoms frighteningly similar to Tourette's syndrome, with one striking difference. GCS cases often begin spewing their wildly ridiculous assertions and claims as soon as they exit the country of their birth.

A poignant case in point: Chris Matthews. Upon arriving in Toronto he found himself unable to speak in a non-silly fashion. Soldiering on with the bravery we've come to expect from our courgeous media folks he delivered the speech.

Several attendees mentioned to me the severe angle of his cranium during the performance and the slurred speech.

One Canuck in particular broke out in piteous tears as he related the details in a Freedom Folks exclusive.

"It all seemed innocent enough at first. He came out to wild applause and began to praise the Bush administration, sure, I was surprised, but as he spoke his cranium began to tilt. Early on I'd say it was at, oh...about forty-degree angle, but then it really started to go and he got wilder and wilder." At this point our brave Canuck broke down in manly tears, one slim hand held up to his face. As he backed away the slogan on his T-shirt seemed truer than ever, "Bush McChimpie Hitler = The Devil".

Quotes such as “The period between 9-11 and (invading) Iraq was not a good time for America. There wasn’t a robust discussion of what we were doing,” or .”If we stop trying to figure out the other side, we’ve given up. The person on the other side is not evil. They just have a different perspective."

These, unfortunately, are classic signals of GCS.

Don't judge him harshly Mr. and Mrs. America. He deserves our pity and our understanding.

Help end this scourge by sending a check to: The Freedom Folks, GCS Make It Stop!

Case seen @ The Political teen
Second opinions:
Stop The ACLU

Chris Matthews
loony left
media asshats