Sacramento: Liberal Stupidity Rears Its Ugly Head

Dragon Master has a great post up on this.

Let me add my .02 (just to avoid confusion my comments are in black, the original is in blue)

A RESOLUTION OPPOSING THE WAR IN IRAQ AND CALLING ON PRESIDENT BUSH TO BEGIN THE WITHDRAWAL OF AMERICAN TROOPS

WHEREAS, the United States of America carried out an invasion of Iraq based upon the claim that Iraq possessed weapons of mass destruction, and therefore posed an immediate threat to the security of the United States and still no evidence has been found that Iraq possessed such weapons or the capability to deploy them; and

WHEREAS, we the city of Sacramento don't have the common sense of a rutabega. Furthermore, as we lack basic language skills we cannot understand much of anything that isn't spoon fed to us by liberal media types. We also have never heard of UN resolution 1441, or the ten years Saddam spent thumbing his nose at the civilized world.

WHEREAS, the war and military occupation of Iraq, according to the Department of Defense, have cost the lives of over 2,000 U.S. troops, as well as wounding and disabling over 15,000 troops. Iraqi civilian deaths are estimated at over 100,000 men, women and children; and

WHEREAS, we the city of Sacramento are bereft of courage and honor, we will act as if we care that brave men and women have fallen in our service. Furthermore, we, the city of Sacramento lack spines, could somebody help us, please?

WHEREAS, we recognize the courage of the over 1 million American military personnel, including city staff and many residents of the City of Sacramento, who have served in the war in Iraq. They have faced extraordinary danger and have made huge sacrifices in this war; we now want them to come home because bringing them home is the best means of protecting them and the interest of our nation; and

WHEREAS, we the city of Sacramento do not fully understand what a soldier is, and will continue to bleat in this fashion until we got our way by our sheer ability to annoy.

WHEREAS, Nebraska Republican Senator Chuck Hagel, a member of the Senate Foreign Relations Committee, stated in August of this year, "the reality is that we're losing in Iraq,” and that "there is a parallel emerging" between the War in Iraq and the War in Vietnam; and

WHEREAS, we the city of Sacramento would like to fellate Chuck Hagel. Thanks Chuck for being such a ginormous asshat!

WHEREAS, Retired Army Lieutenant General William Odom, a Vietnam veteran, said in September of this year that the invasion of Iraq alienated America's Middle East allies, making it harder to prosecute a war against terrorists, and he said the United States should withdraw from Iraq; and

WHEREAS, the city of Sacramento hates war and our brave warriors, we love any military man who will say anything negative regarding the aforementioned war. Plus, we'd like to fellate him too.

WHEREAS, A Bi-partisan group of Members of Congress - two Republicans and two Democrats - introduced the Homeward Bound Act on June 16, 2005 to begin the process of putting in place an exit strategy from Iraq. The Act now has 60 co-sponsors; and

WHEREAS, A bi-partisan group of ginormous asshats opened their collective pieholes and spewed what passes for thought in Washington, DC. Plus, we'll fellate any Republican who is against the war.

WHEREAS, Wisconsin United States Senator Russ Feingold, a member of the Senate Foreign Relations Committee, has proposed a timeframe for the completion of the military mission in Iraq and suggested December 31, 2006 as the target date for the completion of the withdrawal of American troops from Iraq; and

WHEREAS, Wisconsin United States Senator Russ Feingold has tipped the enemy off. As a potential treasonous scumbag we cannot express enough admiration for this fellow.

WHEREAS, the war in Iraq has cost American taxpayers over $350 billion. Broken down per person in the United States, the cost so far is $727, or $295 million from the residents from the City of Sacramento, making the Iraq War the most expensive military effort in the last 60 years; and

WHEREAS, we the city of Sacramento have placed a price on freedom and safety. We just hope everybody will recognize how brave we are for our traitorous position.

WHEREAS, the continuation of the war and the redirection of our nation’s resources will cause grave harm to the people of Sacramento, especially its low income residents and communities of color; and

WHEREAS, we the city of Sacramento really have no idea what were talking about, we'll just make la-la noises until you leave.

WHEREAS, the recent tragedies caused by Hurricanes Katrina and Rita have shown the United States needs to direct massive resources to recovery in the Gulf Coast, and we as a nation should turn our attention and resources to domestic recovery, emergency prevention measures and preparedness activities; and

WHEREAS, the recent tragedies have allowed us liberals great joy. Join us as we sing, "Bigger government, gives us a woody." Oh, and we hate the war.

WHEREAS, over 100 United States cities have passed resolutions calling for an end to the war in Iraq; now

WHEREAS, over a hundred United States cities are traitorous weasels we should condemn the Iraqi's to a horrible fate. Aren't we sensitive?

THEREFORE BE IT RESOLVED THAT the City of Sacramento, on behalf of the citizens of Sacramento, urges President Bush and the United States Congress to commence a humane, orderly, rapid and comprehensive withdrawal of United States military personnel and bases from Iraq; and

THEREFORE BE IT RESOLVED THAT we are grandstanding jerks who could give a fig for our safety or the looming horrible death of Iraqi's. Whatever we say you should do the opposite, the cowardly retreat from Vietnam was our defining moment.

BE IT FURTHER RESOLVED THAT the City of Sacramento calls on President Bush and the Congress of the United States to provide promised veterans’ health, education, disability, and rehabilitation benefits, and otherwise meet the needs of returning veterans.

BE IT FURTHER RESOLVED THAT Democrats and liberals should never, ever be allowed within one hundred feet of our security.