White House Immigration Reform "Fact" Sheet

This was released by the White House earlier today:

The President supports comprehensive immigration reform to secure our border, improve enforcement of our laws, and uphold our values. The President also discussed his proposal for a temporary worker program that rejects amnesty, allows foreign workers to fill jobs no American is willing to do, and reduces smuggling and crime at the border.

It seems that rhetoric like "jobs Americans don't want" and "jobs Americans won't do" didn't piss the people who elected Bush off enough for his liking. Now it's "jobs no American is willing to do." Way to kick the bullshit-o-meter up a notch, Mr. President.

The "fact" sheet goes on for five pages, as government "fact" sheets are wont to do. Five pages of insulting the citizens of this country. Five pages of self-congratulatory statements about alleged progress that's been made. Five pages of outright lies, carefully worded half-lies, and other assorted bullshit.

A few of my favorites:

The President Strongly Believes America Is Stronger And More Dynamic When New Citizens Are Welcomed.

I live in the huge, diverse city of Chicago. I don't see new citizens not being welcomed. I fully welcome new citizens, as in those who value American citizenship enough to respect our laws and follow the lengthy and often arduous path to citizenship. It's the millions who take a leak on our laws by coming, staying and working here ILLEGALLY that chap my ass.

The President Welcomes A Civil And Dignified Debate On Comprehensive Immigration Reform.

Does a civil and dignified debate include labeling citizens who dare to disagree with your immigration policy nativists, xenophobes and vigilantes?

To Keep The Promise Of America, We Must Enforce The Laws Of America

D'OH! We have been asking, pleading, begging you to do just that: keep your promise and enforce the laws of America.

The First Element Is Securing Our Border.

We're waiting.

The Second Element Is Strengthening Enforcement Of Our Laws In The Interior Of Our Country.

Still waiting.

The Third Element Is Creating A New Temporary Worker Program That Would Not Provide Amnesty.

When we're presented with a temporary worker program that would not provide amnesty, we'll be sure to let you know. Yep. Still waiting.

A Temporary Worker Program Should Not Provide Amnesty. Granting amnesty unfairly allows those who break the law to jump ahead of people who play by the rules and wait in the citizenship line. Amnesty would also encourage future waves of illegal immigration...

Amnesty is forgiveness. Letting people who are here illegally stay is forgiveness. Letting people who work here illegally keep their jobs is forgiveness. Giving people who come, stay, and work here illegally a "path to citizenship" goes beyond forgiveness for breaking our laws: it's a REWARD for breaking our laws. If you think amnesty would encourage future waves of illegal immigration, just wait and see what rewarding it will do.

Oh, wait -- you don't have to. JUST PICK UP A FREAKIN' HISTORY BOOK.

Not that it's any great surprise to anyone, but this president wouldn't know a "fact sheet on immigration reform" if it jumped up and bit his hairy white ass.

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