A Little Something for the Fellas

In all the talk recently swirling around the Supreme Court nominees one issue has predominated.

Abortion.

Oops, did I say abortion? I, of course, meant to say Choice!

That's right, because it's not the brutal murder of a cute little baby. NO WAY MAN! It's a choice, damn your conservative eyes.

Okay, now that we have that settled. All this talk about abort...sorry, I don't know what my problem is.

Choice. Yes, all this talk about choice got me thinking, and here's what I thought.

What's in it for the fellas? I'll tell you what's in it for the fellas...nothin'. that's what.

So what can we do to involve our men in this critical issue? I have a thought. See, back in Roman days they had this cool thing called Paterfamilias. Here's how it worked:

If the lady of the house or the rug rats pissed off the dude he had options. He could --

1) Kill her

or

2) Sell her into slavery

As a fella preparing to celebrate his thirteenth wedding anniversary in the near future, I assure you there's quite a bit to recommend this idea.

1) Chicks are crazy

2) See #1

Now, there are those amongst us so brainwashed by the fairer sex that they will be making a sad mewling noise about rights and understanding at this point. To these sensitive individuals I say FOR GODS SAKE SHUT UP!!

To those furry-pitted champions of baby killing who may be spluttering like tea kettles at my idea, allow me to say...Death or slavery?

You've come a long way baby!